Remembering What I Love About Summer, Even While COVID is Raging and the West is on Fire

I was trying to make a list of things I love about summer, as a reminder to myself that this resurgence of COVID, not to mention the devastating wildfires, can’t take away my joy...but the truth is, my list was sad and boring. I love berry season, and especially eating berries with the kids in my life. These kids will crush a pint of berries while you have your back turned for just a minute. I love waking up with the sun, and drinking a cup of coffee while things still feel quiet. I love picking flowers, watering at dusk, and looking at other peoples’ gardens. Lately, I love making a simple meal when the day is over. A summer movie? A trip to my favorite bustling metropolis during the summer when no one sleeps because it’s too hot? Sitting outside in the afternoon at an outdoor table at a crowded restaurant? Car packed with whoever is free for a random river trip? Huge outdoor Pride parties? There are things I miss so deeply that “miss” is not even the word for what it is I’m feeling. There are feelings I’ve forgotten, or tucked away somewhere. It’s grief. We didn’t choose this, and yet here we are. 

COVID has insisted that I live in this moment right here. I’m a dreamer, a thinker, I live for something to look forward to.  I have inadvertently become interested in moments of pause, sights that are only seen once, flavor combinations that are right now, something I’m laughing at right this second. I’m not sure how else to do this.